Wednesday, November 08, 2006

There are some days when the column writes itself

Every morning, I walk from our humble little apartment to the El Station and I always pass a few newspaper vending machines. I was curious which would grab the headline today. Would it be, "Oh yeah, election yesterday, complete change in party control of Congress" or Britney Spears files for divorce.

Sure enough, America's dumbest paper (warning: huge file) had the election as the main splash, but the banner headline was the delightfully tacky, "Fed-Exed"

Speaking of the election last night and Kevin Federline, I believe a new Federline Award presentation is in order. Last night, during his acceptance speech following his re-election to the governorship of Illinois, Rod Blagojevich said the following: "Four years ago, I came here and found a state government that was more interested in serving itself, rather than the other way around." Salve stultus! Popozao!

That makes about as much sense as electing a movie star to be the governor of the largest state in the union. Again.

On to the news:

The dangers of dogs and alcohol
(There was a Far Side comic on the subject)

Best headline of the day
(Or most groan-worthy)

What to do with those pesky campaign signs
(Now this is a promotion!)

Bright, shiny objects:

Stolen from my brother's away message
(Flight of the Conchords, "Business Time")

The soccer kama sutra
(At least some of the photos haven't been taken down)

Today's random "next blog":

Cognition II
(Apparently, movie reviews and Florida sports, plus instead of "posted by" it says "fecit". I get it!)

Today's strange anniversary:

November 8, 1966 -- Movie actor Ronald Reagan elected governor of California. Yeah.

Fun fact of the day:

Many hamsters only blink one eye at a time.

And finally:

More from the "strange conversations that my wife and I have" category. Today, we discussed the following: If you knew you were going to be eaten for a meal by a cannibal, what meal would you want that to be. She went with dinner. I'd go with lunch.

What say you, viewing public?

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