Tuesday, October 17, 2006

But it's in the Bible!

About a month ago, I inaugurated the Shatner Award, given the person who makes great sacrifices to in the field of personal dignity for the least amount of money. The award, named after the greatest practitioner of such things, William Shatner, is today awarded for thefirst time.

Mike Tyson, congratulations. You have won the inaugural Shatner Award for making a mockery of yourself.

A Where's Waldo Checklist for a fallen icon:

1) He made his kick-off announcement at an Italian restaurant in Strongsville, Ohio. Nothing against Strongsville, but it really isn't anything other than a little suburb of Cleveland. I've been there.
2) He says it's for charity... despite the fact that most of the money will go to help him pay his debts.
3) Is there a precedent for a once-proud athlete turning himself into a walking side show?
4) "Yeah, sure I'd fight women."

This week's theme:
The MLB playoffs

Well.... they got rained out last night in St. Louis. Other than the fact that now Glavine and Weaver are going on full rest, is there really anything else to say?

Baseball bits:

Lou Pinella was officially introduced as the Cubs manager. As someone who lives half a mile from Wrigley, in two years, people will be wondering what the hell they were thinking. Pinella had a press conference in which he said that the team would go into spring training ready to win. Easy things to say before you actually have to do anything. Ken Macha was dropped by the A's. Apparently going to the ALCS isn't a good year. Meanwhile, the Rangers, Giants, and Nats are all still looking. For some reason, the name of Oakland A's third base coach Ron Washington seems to be consistently thrown around. The Phillies hired former managers Davy Lopes (late of the Brewers), Art Howe (late of the Astros, A's, and Mets), and Jimy Williams (late of... a lot of places) and then swore it had nothing to do with setting up replacements for Charlie Manuel.

The Cubs want Alfonso Soriano to come play center field and hit leadoff, which he will do better than Juan Pierre by default. So do the Phillies, who also want to trade Pat Burrell. The Yankees are trying to decide whether they should pay 38-year-old Gary Sheffield $13 million next year, or let him go to the Red Sox.

On to the news:

Man breaks into jail
(Bonus: Alcohol was involved!)

Personal ad from a 105-year-old man
(Make your own joke. I am)

Chinese business students required to take golfing lessons
(Good idea?)

Bright, shiny objects:

My wife sent me this
(I have no idea what it is... but it's funny)

My wife sent me this too
(Ah, irreverant t-shirts... for babies)

Today's Random "Next Blog":

Killer Camel
(I have no idea what this is, but it's in English!)

Today's Strange Anniversary:

October 17, 1967 -- "Hair" premieres on Broadway. Which, I suppose, was the dawning of the age of Aquarius.

Fun fact of the day:

In a 1631 edition of the King James Bible, in Exodus 20 verse 14, the word "not" was left out. This changed the 7th commandment to read, "Thou shalt commit adultery." Most of the copies were recalled immediately and destroyed on the orders of Charles I. But there are 11 copies still remaining. They are known as the "Wicked Bible." (The Bible museum in Branson, Missouri has one on display.) The printer was fined the equivelant of $400.

And finally:

Oh yeah, over the weekend my wife and I had a rematch in Trivial Pursuit. Booyakasha! Who da man?

1 comment:

Dove Knits said...

Yes, be proud of winning Trivial Persuit against me. You're probably also proud about beating midgets in basketball.